Coping with end-of-semester blues

I always get the blues at the end of a semester. Blues mixed with relief, but blues nonetheless. I think it’s mostly about losing the structure. I have no idea what to do with myself. Blah!

I want to go out & do something social. Where do quiet, still-waters-running-deep, intellectual-type homos hang out? Hmph. Or even friendly, progressive, and sane; straight, bi, or lesbian people. Meeting introverts is always a pain. Even, and perhaps especially, for other introverts.

Giving up on the conundrum, I could head to dreamhaven or play a game of San Juan with (to which he just agreed, yay!).

Dreamhaven would have been cool last night, since I’m on the Bujold kick lately. She was reading there. Two blocks from my house. Oh well. I really did need to go to that econ review session.

weekend get away?

I am feeling so restless and stir crazy, I don’t want to wait until next week to get the heck out of dodge. Fortunately, there is travelzoo.com 😉

$120 roundtrip to denver
$135 roundtrip to chicago
$149 roundtrip to dallas

hmmmm, maybe….

Then again, thursday evening party, saturday evening party, and friday evening concert thing. Maybe I should just practice being still this weekend. Find myself a yoga class or something. =)

My weekend

Veggie dinner, Some bar hopping, some final fantasy xi, some cleaning the place, some hitting the gym.

Veggie dinner: Compassionate action for animals had a holiday potluck. I enjoyed it. I found it remarkable just how low the waistlines of young ladies’ jeans have fallen. I was also bemused to see a britney spears wannabe corner at a veggie potluck. Bemusing. The food was good, and the company not bad.

Bar hopping: Bolt Underground shirtless night wasn’t that exciting or populated. But it was good to meet . Then dropped over to Saloon with the shower show and what not, saw Joe, chatted for a bit, caught the bus home. The following night, I went to BU, and it was much more hoppin’. I spent most of my time chatting with Alex, one of the people who’d been cruising me (and cruised in return) while I was talking with the night before. I also saw Brennan and his boyfriend Craig. Craig is goofy and entertaining. Brennan … seemed a little cool-tending-towards-but-not-quite-unfriendly. Maybe I was getting too pally with Craig. *shrug* I said hi in no small part because I left my shirt in their car two or three months ago when I went out to BU with QGPA. And they hadn’t gotten back to me about it, despite emails directed towards them. Alex ended up giving me a ride home and popping in for a bit.

Gym: Got up too late for swim team, but I did go into the gym in the afternoon. Upper body, woo. =) I freely admit to vanity over the definition I get while I’m actually lifting the weights. Plus it feels good, in the end. And via the sauna, I have a date at a nearby coffeeshop in a couple hours.

ffxi: Mesharr began her bardtastic and rangerriffic careers over the weekend. Gobbie bag size was also increased to 40. And I discovered that my uncooperative moogle still hasn’t decided to grant me the mog safe increasing quest, despite having a nice bronze bed to sleep in. grrrr. That fuzzy little punk doesn’t know how good he has it. I took away his bed and will put it back after the next region update, but before the next one I’m around for after that. Goldsmithing up to 3. Will likely do more mining runs after classes are over.

cleaning: I finally put all the excess paper that grad school generates into a little recycling bag. I feel I ought to do a summary post on topics of interest from my classes, for my own memory, if nothing else. But that will be later. I’ve done half the dishes, but of course, it’s the older half that remains (it was on the bottom after all). Some laundry catching up. And I’ve finally purchased some hangers to help organize my room. Slowly but surely.

It’s good to see that my socialization is far from suffering from my abdication of gay.com etc. Bars seem not quite right. I may shoot for the gay men’s chorus (and the like) instead.

Plans for the holidays proceed apace, all stops have confirmed hostliness waiting for me. Now I just need to buy tickets, and advertise my impending arrivals more broadly. =)

Re: Saying No to Speed

In response to a post in , pointed out to me by

from the friend of the boyfriend of a friend crowd… =)

I agree deeply with much of what you say. I have not owned a car in 4ish years. Quite deliberately. Cars are powerfully beneficial to their user and have a list of externalities that are simply extraordinary. Being the kind of idealist that I am, I shoot for very low externalities.

So, as a suggestion, as you originally billed it, it will go nowhere, and it will go there fast. It is entirely politically infeasible in the current environment. I’m sure you knew that before you even started composing the post.

In a later comment, though, you referred to it as a thought experiment, and I’d like to get into that angle on it.

You clearly aren’t opposed to speedy travel. I’m hearing that your main concerns are the human-built environment interaction, efficiency, safety, and expense.

I would like to point out that you may be working things backwards, with regard to the built environment. Speed limits have to be the most routinely violated law in existence. They are violated because people don’t like driving that much, and want to get it over with, so they can do other, more enjoyable things. People drive at a level of risk that matches their urgency. The level of risk is partially a function of the road. People will go 80 on Highway 101, but they would never go 80 (and survive) on the gravel road next to which I grew up. Further, in towns like chicago, and san francisco that a densely built with good railed transportation, many people forgo a car because it’s expensive, parking is a pain, and it represents little savings of time or effort. I assure you, the highways through chicago rarely see motorists going anywhere near 80. To change the way our built environment works, and the way we interact with it, we should change our built environment. Advocating for greenspace, for the repeal of sprawl-enforcing zoning regulations, for minimum rather than maximum building heights, and for the development of public space in general, will be more effective.

Another big item is public education. People are moving to the suburbs to get their kids into better schools. Most of what they pay for their housing is really getting their kids into a good school, in a way that simultaneously pays them back economically. Working to revitalize the urban public schools may do as much as anything to get people out of their cars, and interacting with one another.

Another point on the gay bars in the suburbs. There’s a reason the gay bars are in the downtown areas. That’s where gay men (and most other minorities) congregate, and for a reason. If you want to see other people like, but are not a terribly common group, you are probably better off going where there are alot of people to find them. (some exceptions certainly apply, native american reservations, for instance. Even so, native americans also tend to cluster in the larger cities in rural areas, like minneapolis, for instance). Homos huddle for the ability to be safely open about their identity, and for a chance of dating/love. I suspect a tightening of the transportation network would result in an increase in gay neighborhood clustering, that is to say, more homos moving from San Jose to the Castro, more than in gay bars springing up in San Jose.

As for efficiency, another major concern on that front has to do with the roads themselves. The optimal use of roads happens at about 55 mph, with about 2,200 vehicles per hour passing a given point in each lane (Roughly, I think). At 20 mph, far fewer vehicles are going through per hour. Within urban contexts, the opportunity cost of the land is huge, and it is important to make good use of the capacity that is there. Rail would certainly be more efficient to operate, but is vastly more expensive to build. And then there’s the efficient use of human time. If one is going down a stretch of highway in, say, texas, or new mexico, and there’s not a soul in sight that could be harmed by higher speeds, why should one be forced to drive more slowly?

Safety you’re quite correct on. Others have pointed out the emergency vehicle exception, but emergency vehicles are already the exception to so many rules anyway, that that would be non-problematic. In terms of expense, you are quite correct regarding fuel efficiency, but the questions of opportunity cost are huge and ought to be considered.

Those are my quick thoughts. Heh.

3 assignments, 2 finals, 1 quiz and 1 portfolio

I’m tempted to go for a 12 days of christmas parody.

The semester is really winding down. I have a team stats assignment due tuesday. A one page public management memo (on a case I have yet to read, enh) also due tuesday. A one or two page informational interview report due wednesday (she’s indicated flexibility, though, which is good because I haven’t even contacted potential interviewees), a 6-8 page interview portfolio due on the 22nd, an econ quiz, and two finals I could ace in my sleep. Writing it all down, it seems like alot, but it so very much isn’t.

Personals ad

In another of my endless revisions…

I’m not in marketing. And it so shows in my ads. Much like a resume, the idea is to draw people in, right? Except, much like a resume, you want to attract particular interest. It’s easy to focus on what you don’t like, but there’s a huge list there that everyone has. “I don’t want to date dishonest people”. No kidding, really? And another huge list that individuals have: “I don’t want to date someone who watches alot of television,” might be one of mine, and another friend of mine doesn’t want to date vegetarians, as he would find his options constrained when cooking for them. But the negatives are a huge turn off. I don’t compress well into a few lines of text. Nobody does.

I can write resumes or personals ads with general appeal. I can write them to accurately detail me. I can even write something targeted to one particular person/position by selecting the particular things that best match their interests. But I’ll be damned if I know how to write something which simultaneously explains what I have to offer, and what I want in a way that intrigues the good matches and repels/bores the bad ones. I suspect this is partially because I don’t really have a firm handle on what I want. I may be thinking about this all wrong.

I reject the notion that there’s one perfect person out there. It’s reasonable that I should also ditch the notion that there’s a set of ideal characteristics. I probably need to experiment with the boyfriend of the month club to figure out what I actually like. Heh.

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