Category: Uncategorized

Money Matters

Many people have commented that arnold isn’t so bad because at least his social policies are ‘basically right’. Newsflash: republicans (as a statistical generalization) don’t care one whit about ‘social’ issues. It’s a convenient way to shepherd voters. Witness the blind eye they turn to arnold’s sexual misconduct, when they’re willing to impeach clinton for it.

Another newsflash: Fiscal policy has serious social ramifications. Tax and funding strategies, market regulation, and redistributive efforts make differences on a scale like nothing else in the day to day operation of every american’s life. Especially in terms of employment and housing. You know, the little things.

Final newsflash: The Governator may be a democrat when it comes time for me to get a civil union (though not a marriage). But when the cards are on the table, and it’s time for me to get a job or a condo, you can bet he’ll be republican to the core.

Some considered thoughts on the recall results from workingforchange.com:

http://www.workingforchange.com/article.cfm?ItemID=15794

shyness, introversion and social ineptitude

What I am about to say should not be taken as criticism by any of the excellent hosts who have had me over, all of whom have lj’s, only one of whose journals I never read (don’t know her id), and, I suspect only one of whom never reads my journal. That having been said, I really haven’t enjoyed myself at the past 4 parties to which I’ve been. Drinking, food I would never eat in any other context, making out (at all but one party), nudity (only at two parties), and other recreation substances (only at one party). Each of these left me feeling a little more sad and out of place, and less wanting to be there. Potluck vegetarian dinner parties and gaming parties are way more my speed. So, I spent much time thinking about it all.

I’m used to attributing my lack of enjoyment of parties to a lack of social skills, and I often feel that I’m not interacting well with others. Shannon, a registered extrovert, pretty much shot down my claims of social awkwardness. Forced to drop the answer I came up with at age 12 and actually think, I came to the conclusion that it’s because I am not interested by topics that they care about and vice-versa. Introversion is something else, a preference for navel gazing over communication. Dealing in the interior world, rather than the exterior one. Shyness is also a separate issue to my mind. That’s just insecurity/embarrasment based social hesitation. A high entry cost for interaction, as it were.

I am not especially shy. Nor do I consider myself terribly socially inept these days. I was definitely both in my first year or two at cmu. I hadn’t had much opportunity to interact with peers in a healthy fashion prior to that, so I had alot of catching up to do. But I threw myself into it, to the point where I got my first D since music class in 8th grade. I am somewhat introverted, but I do not think I’m am all that unusually so. I am often sad at the apparent lack of people I share interests with. This is probably why Josh returning to omnivorism left me with a small nameless ennui. It was a loss of common experience with someone close to me.

I am left with the thought that shared with me during my last trip to Toronto. Over indian food at a restaurant Chris had found for us (he’s a fabulous tour guide, wish I got to see more of him) I had, less than diplomatically, shared with him the feeling that I was too old for the people I was hanging out with. He offered instead that perhaps I was “inappropriately contextualized”. And that I believe I am. A soul in search of the proper context.

tuesday evening

Had another unsuccessful yahoo date, and then went to check out open floor gymnastics stuff at the uc berkeley golden bears rec center. Cool stuff going on, varying ability levels. Patrick (a recent friendster acquaintance) told me about it and offered to show me the ropes. I think I’m going to do it. I always wanted to do serious gymnastics stuff. I really enjoyed the brief gymnastics stuff I did as a little kid. Perhaps this will reduce my monkey climbing nature, or at least add variety to the expression of it. =) The incredible bodies there are nice too, but I’d do this even if it were just me and an unattractive (but highly competent) trainer.

class stuff

I finally talked to my prof about the paper I’m supposed to be writing. Sort of. I sent him an email a couple weeks ago (shortly before our topics were due) and heard nothing back from him. And he never got back to me. So today, I went up to him, and awkwardly and unassertively pointed it out to him. Ugh. Appointment is friday. Also, the library sent me a ‘return the book or we’ll kill your dog and burn your house down’ notice regarding ‘making room: the economics of homelessness’, ie, the centerpiece of the paper I want to write. Maybe I should just buy myself a copy… =)

monday, byebye & Bubba-hotep

On the last day in town for our cslounge visitors, it was tichu, tichu, tichu, lunch from the crepe place on euclid (I got a burrito instead), followed by more tichu, and the departure of the austin crowd. The non-austin crowd, Ken, and Brian as well as Tom, Simon, Cort and I went out to see Bubbahotep. It’s the sort of movie I typically wouldn’t be caught dead in. And despite the jackass behind us making moronic comments I enjoyed it. Afterwards, I walked home to drive ken & brian’s stuff down to the bart station for them. And so ended my weekend.

I can’t say I ever felt terribly part of the cslounge crowd while at cmu, but, as I commented on friday evening, while driving Rehana and Nick back to berkeley, they were both welcoming and alot of fun to be with. I greatly enjoyed my weekend.

This weekend

So, after thursday/friday, I oughta rest, right? Well, funny you should mention that…

Saturday started off with a grocery trip, or was it tichu? Tichu is occupying a very large portion of this weekend, fun little card game. But I purchased much produce, and a few other things besides (orange milanos as a gift to our dungeonmaster for the weekend ;). Did I mention that we have something like 8 guests in our house this weekend? After groceries, I hung out, shot the shit, and played a few rounds of tichu. Then it was off to the city to help & ted move stuff out of their apartment. Third floor of a structure with tall floors. And no elevators. It was good. Definitely got the blood flowing. Good thing I hadn’t worked out since tuesday. That experience makes me think seriously about shedding some excess weight (mostly books that I’ll never read) now, so that I don’t end up doing what I did last time, and move food whose expiration date had passed by the time I packed it. Anyway…

Got to see their new condo with the balcony, and the roof-top deck. Easy walking distance from powerhouse (not power exchange. Well, I hear it is easy walking distance from that, too, but you are faaaar less likely to find me there). Then off to bart. An hour+ of dnd wankery on the train made the ride go by so fast. Druids have cool spells.

Tom picks me up at the fremont bart station, and I head off to a party at la casa de y . I was told I was the designated driver for ‘s CRX. There was drinking and het making out (I heard there were several bi females there, but I don’t recall seeing evidence of the female on female portion of this attraction), and a couple of go games (courtesy whom I haven’t really seen since his engagement. Apparently he and Laura will be marrying next weekend, so I issued my congratulations just under the wire 😉

After about half an hour of negotiation, I drove Nick and Rehana home. We had a lively, continuous conversation, with a returning theme of pointless conflict v self congratulatory circle jerks v legitimate exploration of alternate perspectives. It was interesting. Home just before midnight. Then sleep, and up (with the sun, as per usual. Gaming today, yay! =)

little proud moments

Today I have pulled an allnighter, and produced meaningful work getting in a full half week while ro is away. and I made dinner: falafel, hummus, pita, tahini sauce, salad and a vinagrette-y dressing, helped get ready for his not-house-warming party, and came back home to play games with the visiting cmu alums. After that was finished, riding a wave of sleep dep, I pulled the casing off my broken-screen laptop diagnosed the misconnected wire, taped it together so it connects, fixing the screen, then screwed everything back together.

I so need to sleep.