Ever been writing up the stirring conclusion to long post about the changes you’re going to make, only to hit the ‘close tab’ hotkey? Talk about resisting change. 😉
Here’s the cliff’s notes. My basic pattern for writing a paper is to assemble everything that looks like it’s probably relevant ahead of time, and start reading and writing at the last minute. I form the outline as I go, and I usually figure out the conclusion after I’m halfway through the paper. I do this all at the 11th hour. If there were a goal-reason for this, I’d say it was bragging rights, but there really isn’t. This is an evolved, and deeply ingrained habit that’s dragging me down. Deeply ingrained does not mean unbreakable.
Growing old happens inevitably, with no effort on anyone’s part. Growing up is a choice. Or a series of choices. I’m ready to grow up a bit more, and I’ll make the changes I need to. This shit ain’t gonna fly forever.