Of late, I’ve been forcibly reminded that while I have a very broad aesthetic taste in men, it doesn’t coincide neatly with who I want to mess around with. And there are alot of older (less than 10 years, usually) guys that I think look great. But when it comes to making out, my interest rapidly wanes. With a few noteworthy exceptions. I think that alot of it is a maladaptive response. By which I mean, I have a reflex to jump someone’s bones, or go along with jumping their bones, if I think they look good. This reflex has served me ill on many occasions. <\/p>\n
Talking with a certain friend of mine in California less than a year ago, I’d said that I wondered if we were used to responding to certain situations differently. In that case I was talking about stress. He’s a very athletic, outdoorsy, fellow, and, when wanting stimulation, and perhaps when under stress, he goes out and does athletic stuff, and may occasionally engage in risky rockclimbing behavior. That’s a theory, it’s not intended so much as a description of him, as a theoretical model for contrast. I have often taken the bonobo strategy: using sex as the preferred palliative for nearly all forms of distress. Which clearly creates problems all its own.<\/p>\n
Feige had a lecture on a theme which she often repeated in my presence: “Yeah, he’s pretty. But there are also pretty paintings. I don’t want to fuck the paintings.” (something about me seems to encourage that sort of repetition of theme, see also What does one do with aesthetically pleasing, but sexually unappealing people? (A very distinct class from the sexually appealing, but sexually unavailable people, though I can’t help seeng some bizarre connection). Enh, just food for thought.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Of late, I’ve been forcibly reminded that while I have a very broad aesthetic taste in men, it doesn’t coincide neatly with who I want to mess around with. And there are alot of older (less than 10 years, usually) guys that I think look great. But when it comes to making out, my interest … Continue reading “pretty v attractive”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1179","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/cheerfulchaotic.crazycrew.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1179","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/cheerfulchaotic.crazycrew.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/cheerfulchaotic.crazycrew.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cheerfulchaotic.crazycrew.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cheerfulchaotic.crazycrew.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1179"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/cheerfulchaotic.crazycrew.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1179\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/cheerfulchaotic.crazycrew.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1179"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cheerfulchaotic.crazycrew.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1179"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cheerfulchaotic.crazycrew.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1179"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}