In the spirit of being un-blackmail-able by keeping no embarrassment secret:<\/p>\n
A few weeks ago, I noticed something in the shower while cleaning my pucker. It’s probably been there for a little while longer, but the forces of denial are strong. It’s hard to get a clear view of one’s own asshole, but once I did, it became pretty clear to me that I have anal warts, mostly on the inside. At a physical today (inspired by my own observation), the doc shared my assessment. <\/p>\n
I already knew I had at least one strain of the virus (the various strains tend to stick to similar locations, as I understand it), like alot of people, on my feet, and on one of my fingers. But I can’t say I’m pleased with this new development. Not by a long shot. Getting rid of the actual warts isn’t pleasant or quick, generally speaking, but that’s not my main concern.<\/p>\n
While the warts can be removed, the virus can’t, true of many of the most persistent and widespread stds (warts, herpes, and hiv, in particular). I am determined not to be typhoid scu. If you haven’t noticed, I am extraordinarily averse to deliberately or negligently causing harm. Rationally, I know that this one only puts my ass off limits, which, to be honest, has never been involved in my favorite sexual activities, but I can’t help feeling that this brings an end to my sex life.<\/p>\n
Welcome to the leper colony, please hand over your dick, you won’t be needing that anymore. It’s a phase one goes through with std’s. The first time I got crabs, my initial reaction was much more extreme. Of course, unlike crabs, this one will be sticking around. Wait a year or two before prodding me on this topic. It’ll be a sore topic (literally and figuratively) for quite some time to come, I imagine. Rationally, I know better than to believe my dick will be indefinitely detained in dry dock, but reason isn’t always the loudest voice in my head.<\/p>\n
When he said “stay healthy”, on his way out the door, my quiet, sardonic snort expressed my feelings pretty well. “Other than that, Mrs Lincoln, how was the play?”<\/p>\n
Then again, as I reviewed my medical history, in telling it to him: heart disease and diabetes are a plague on my dad’s side, something I will very likely escape in good form courtesy veganism, my pedestrian lifestyle, and my hyperactivity. And my various athletic\/weightlifting accidents (near-hernia, damaged left shoulder, 80% functional rotator cuffs, IT Band troubles, etc) actually trouble me very little. I am pretty fortunate. It could be alot worse. <\/p>\n
So when he said “other than that, you’re pretty healthy”, I really do have some things to be thankful for. <\/p>\n
And unsurprisingly, still HIV negative. Same day tests rock.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
In the spirit of being un-blackmail-able by keeping no embarrassment secret:<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1137","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/cheerfulchaotic.crazycrew.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1137","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/cheerfulchaotic.crazycrew.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/cheerfulchaotic.crazycrew.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cheerfulchaotic.crazycrew.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cheerfulchaotic.crazycrew.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1137"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/cheerfulchaotic.crazycrew.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1137\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/cheerfulchaotic.crazycrew.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1137"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cheerfulchaotic.crazycrew.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1137"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cheerfulchaotic.crazycrew.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1137"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}